Hydrated
by Joki of Sassgard
Summary: "Do you want to jump in puddles?" FROZEN PARODY. Follow the story of the water-logged queen of Arendelle and her sister that is obsessed with chocolate. I don't own the cover just found it on the internet. Please review! (Written in collab with Toothless the Adorable Dragon)
1. The Boring Opening Scene

**(A/N) What do my siblings and I do when we're bored? We write parodies. Here's our latest project. Hope you get a laugh or two out of it, because we sure laughed writing it! There will be more updates to come so be sure to follow and favorite if you want more! Reviews would be appreciated. Enjoy! **

**Underlined words are being sung**

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_Swish, swish. _A boat rowed out on the lake. _Splash! _

**"**Born of wet and humid air and mountain mist combining…"

Men dunk buckets in the lake.

"This wet force both foul and fair has a hydrated heart worth mining."

A boy and his pet seal followed closely behind on a small raft.

"So scoop up the heart, wet and clear,   
Scoop for love and scoop for fear,   
See the beauty, wet and clear,   
Scoop the water up!  
Beware the liquid heart!"

They all pulled up their buckets, except for the small boy, who was having a bit of trouble.

**"**Hyup! Ho! Watch your step! Let it flow!   
Hyup! Ho! Watch your step! Let it flow!   
Beautiful!   
Powerful!  
Dangerous!   
Bold!"

The men loaded the water in their boats.

"Water has a magic that can't be controlled.   
Stronger than one!   
Stronger than ten!   
Stronger than a hundred men! 

HYUP!   
Born of wet and humid air and mountain mist combining!   
This wet force both foul and fair has a hydrated heart worth mining!   
So scoop up the heart, wet and clear,   
Scoop for love and scoop for fear,   
There beauty and there's danger here,   
Scoop the water up! Beware the liquid heart!"

The boats sailed away. The seal helped the boy haul his bucket up.

He waved for his seal to come. "Come on Sven!"

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**(A/N) Hilarious, right?! *insert sarcams* Don't worry, the opening scene was kinda hard to write. I promise things will pick up soon.  
**


	2. The Water Accident

**(A/N) ON WITH THE SHOW**

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"Elsa!" Five year old Anna's head popped up. "Psst! Elsa!" She crawled on top of her sister and bounced up and down trying to wake her. "Wake up! Wake up! Wake up!"

"Anna, go back to sleep!" Elsa said shoving Anna away and snuggling against her pillow.

"I just can't! My stomach's awake! So I'm awake! So we have to EAT CHOCOLATE!" Anna said throwing her hands around dramatically.

"Go eat by yourself!" Elsa shoved her off the bed. Anna huffed and crossed her arms angrily. Then she got another idea. It wasn't as good as eating chocolate, but it would have to do. She climbed up on Elsa's bed again and opened one of her eyes.

"Do you want to jump in puddles?" Anna asked dragging her words out. Elsa smiled.

"Come on, come on, come on, come on!" Anna said dragging Elsa behind her. They ran in the ball room.

"Do the magic! Do the magic!" She giggled.

"Ready?" She swirled her hands around producing a small rain cloud.

"Wow." Anna whispered in awe. Elsa threw her hands up in the air and a light shower of rain came down. "This is amazing!"Anna cheered running in the rain.

"Watch this!" Elsa tapped her foot on the ground and half an inch of water flooded the floor. They splashed in puddles and played in the rain and slid down a small water slide. Anna splashed the water in the air.

"Catch me!" Anna cheered jumping off the water.

"Hang on!" She caught Anna in a wave of water, so Anna was surfing. "Gotcha!" Wave after wave she jumped higher and higher.

"Again!" She jumped again.

"Wait!" Elsa said, struggling to keep up. "Slow down!" Elsa slipped on the water and fell as Anna cheered and jumped again. "ANNA!" She thrust her hand forwards and the water went up her nose and poor Anna crashed to the floor. "Oh Anna!" She ran over and knelt beside her. A steak of her hair turned light blue. "Mama! Papa!" Elsa cried. The water under them began to ripple and sinister thunder clouds began to form. Elsa's Mom and Dad burst into the room.

"Elsa!" Her Dad said running to them. "What have you done?"

"This is getting out of hand!" Her Mom said.

"It was an accident!" Elsa said. "I'm sorry Anna!" The Queen knelt down and picked Anna up.

"Ewww!" the queen exclaimed, holding Anna out so she wouldn't get her clothes wet. "She's as wet as water!"

"We need to- wait," The King said. "Can you get any wetter than water?" The queen glared at her husband. "Right. I know where we need to go." He ran to the library and frantically searched for the book he needed. After a few minutes of throwing books around, he found a joke book and got distracted. He flipped through the pages and casually strolled to the ball room.

"Guys, listen to this. What's the difference between a tuna and a piano? You can tune a piano, but you can't piano a tuna!" He laughed loudly slapping his knee as tears of mirth filled his eyes.

"Benjamin Charles Jeffery Alexander III," His wife scolded.

"Oh, yeah." He ran back to the library. Eventually, he returned the joke book to the shelf and grabbed the right one.

They mounted on their horses and took off a few minutes later. A small trail of water flowed behind the horse Elsa was on. They ran past Sven and the boy, but took no notice.

"Water?" The boy, Kristoff, said. He pulled Sven on his boat, because seals can't walk on land fast. He followed the trail and saw the king and queen of Arendelle.

"Please help!" The King called. "My daughter!" Small logs rolled and turned and rolled towards them. They showed their faces.

"Trolls?" Kristoff said. The log they were leaning on turned into a troll too.

"Shush, I'm trying to listen!" The troll looked at them. "Ew, what are you? You're squishy and disgusting! I think I'll keep you." She squeezed their faces against hers, but quickly pushed them away.

A large troll rolled up to the king. "Born with the powers or was there a terrible radioactive accident?" He asked.

"Born, and they're getting stronger." The troll touched her head.

"You're lucky it wasn't her ears, it isn't so easy to get water out of your ears. But the nose can be persuaded."

"Do what you must." The King said.

"I recommend we remove all magic, even memories of magic, to be-" He said.

"Wait, wait, wait!" The Queen said. "Why are we removing the memory?"

"Because-"

"Yeah, why can't we just leave the memory in, that way she doesn't have to question why Elsa is so magical?"

"Because- that's just how it goes."

"Oh, ok. Continue." Elsa's dad said.

The troll let out a long breath. "But don't worry, I'll leave the fun." He finished. "Now, she'll be ok."

"But she won't remember I have powers?" Elsa said softly.

"Nope." The queen said, popping the 'p'.

"Listen to me Elsa, your power will only grow." The log troll said. "There is beauty in it, but also great danger. You must learn to control it. Fear will be your enemy." He finished.

"No, we'll protect her." The King said wrapping Elsa in his arms, then pushed her away. She was wet too. "Until then, we'll lock the gates, we'll reduce the staff. We will limit her contact with people and keep her powers hidden from everyone... including Anna."

"Uhhhhh…." The troll said. "But what if there is a terrible accident and you both die then the girls are forced to live a lonely life for years apart from each other until Elsa finally becomes of age and during the coronation her powers are discovered and she runs away to some mountains to hide and there gains confidence and sings an awesome/annoying song while chaos unfolds in the kingdom that involves tons and tons of water and treason?"

They all stared at the log troll in silence. Then the King burst out laughing. "Yeah….." he said. "That'll never happen."

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**(A/N) The "Do You Want To Build A Snowman" parody is coming up next! **


	3. Do You Want to Jump in Puddles?

**A/N: Underlined words are being sung.**

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_Sometime later…_

Anna looks out a window to find that rain is pouring outside. Giddy with excitement, she skipped to Elsa's door, banged with her small fists and began to sing.

"Do you want to jump in puddles?  
Or go singing in the rain!  
I never see you anymore! My life is such a bore!  
I think I'm going insane!

You used to not ignore me, but now you do  
what the heck is up with that?!  
Do you want to jump in puddles?  
They could even be mud puddles!"

"Beat it Anna." Elsa said.

Anna stamped her foot and huffed. "Fine. Whatever."

"ELSA! For the love of reindeer! You are tracking water EVERYWHERE!" The Queen scolded.

"I'm sorry Mom!" Elsa cried, making the water dripping become worse.

"Calm down dear," the King said. He turned to Elsa and held out two sponges. "Here, we'll tape these to your hands. That will help control you powers.

"But won't the tape fall off when it gets wet?" Elsa asked taking the sponges.

"Don't worry." The king reached into his pocket. "We will use…. DUCT TAPE!"

Blah, blah, blah, blah, a bunch of boring stuff happened, and then Anna returned to Elsa's door again.

"Do you want to jump in puddles?  
Or unicycle while it pours?  
I think some rain is overdue  
Lightning strikes are only a few,  
And I miss the thunder's roar!

It gets a little tiresome, staring at the sky  
wanting some clouds to float by!  
CAN'T I JUST HAVE ONE LITTLE CLOUD?!"

Time passed. As it always does. And the Queen and King decided it was time to take a break from their waterlogged daughter, and go on a luxury three week cruse.

"Do you have to go?" Elsa asked quietly.

Her mother stared at Elsa over her hot pink sunglasses. "Duh."

"Don't worry dear." Her dad said trying to balance two beach balls and some suit cases. "It'll only be for a few weeks."

"Hey!" Elsa said. "Where is Anna?"

Anna was running down the hall, whooping and hollering.

"YES! I have the whole castle to myself for three weeks!" She stopped. "Wait, I always have to castle to myself."

And then….. well you've seen the movie. You know what happens.

Anna gently knocked on Elsa's door again.

Hello? Are you still there?  
People are wondering if you're dead  
They keep asking me if you're alive  
And I assure you're fine  
Unlike Mom and Dad!  
They ran into some trouble,  
out on the sea, now the castle really is all mine!  
Do you want to jump in puddles?

Anna slid down to the floor, then jumped right back up. "Uhg! Why is the floor all wet?"

The answer of course was because Elsa had accidentally turned her room into an indoor swimming pool.

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**A/N: Reviews would be greatly appreciated! **


	4. A Million Types of Chocolate

**A/N: Thanks for all the reviews and alerts peoples! Once again, underlined words are being sung.  
**

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_**YEARS LATER:**_

_Knock knock knock!_

"Princess Anna!" a servant banged on the bedroom door.

"Uh….." Anna sat up in bed. Her hair stuck this way and that. "What do you want?" She asked grumpily.

"Oh, sorry to bother you ma'am." He said. "But, it's almost time for your sister's coronation."

"Yeah, okay. I'm going back to bed." She pulled the covers back over her head.

"But this is the moment you have been waiting for all your life!" The guard protested.

"What about it?" But her head was shoved in the pillow is sounded like: "Wmphwa umfou uh?"

"There will be chocolate!"

Anna slowly sat up, her eyes bugging out of her head. "Choooooccoooooolllaaaatee?" She bolted out of her bed and was ready before the sheets hit the ground. Running through the halls, down the stairs, and bouncing on furniture, Anna began to sing:

"The cocoa beans are coming in  
Let the feasting soon begin!  
Who knew there were so many types of chocolate?  
There's milk and white and extra dark  
Carmel and peanuts! Where should I start?  
How on earth am I supposed to wait?!  
They'll be actually real live chefs  
It'll be totally great  
I never had chocolate that I hate

There will be endless amounts of chocolate  
Chocolate pudding, chocolate bisque  
I might get diabetes,  
But I think it's worth a risk!

There may be millions of calories  
Not to mention carbohydrates  
But with so many types of chocolate  
How am I supposed to wait?"

While she was singing Anna skipped and jumped happily through the castle grounds. She stopped to pet what she thought was a cat, but it turned out to be a skunk.

"EW! Now I need to take a bath!" She gasped. "What if I could take a chocolate bath?"

"Tonight imagine me smell and all  
Running up and down the hall  
As people hold their noses and say EWWW!  
I will ignore them as I go  
To the tub where melted chocolate flows  
And bathe while I feast on chocolate stew  
Then I'll dance the rest of the evening  
It will be absolutely crazy  
No chocolate will be safe around me

There will be endless amounts of chocolate  
Chocolate ice cream, chocolate cake  
And I might become obese  
but it's a chance I'm willing to take

It's absolutely maddening  
That ball doesn't start till eight  
And with a million types of chocolate  
How am I supposed to wait?"

Meanwhile, Elsa paced nervously in her room, rubbing her sponges together.

"Don't let them in  
Don't let them see  
Be the good girl you always have to be  
Conceal.  
Don't feel.  
Don't let it flow.  
Make one false move and everyone will know.  
But it's only for to-"

"IT'S ONLY FOR TODAY!" Anna interrupted from the garden.

"Ug!" Elsa groaned. "She's always trying to out-sing me. But not this time." Elsa threw open the window and sang at the top of her lungs. "IT'S AGONY TO WAIT!"

Anna turned around and screamed back: "IT'S AGONY TO WAIT!"

Elsa threw open the door and yelled at her servants. "TELL THE GUARDS TO OPEN UP-"

"THE GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATES!" Anna stole her line.

"DARN IT ANNA!" Elsa stamped her foot. "YOU'RE ALWAYS STEALING MY LINES!"

Anna continued to ignore her and ran into the kingdom still singing. "THERE WILL BE A MILLION TYPES OF CHOCOLATE-"

"DON'T LET THEM IN DON'T LET THEM SEE-"

The sister tried to sing over each other.

"I'M GETTING WHAT I'M DREAMING OF-"

"BE THE GOOD GIRL YOU ALWAYS HAVE TO BE-"

"A CHANCE TO LIVE IN A CHOCOLATE WORLD-"

"HIDE. HIDE DO NOT FEEL-"

"CHOCOLATE IS MY ONE TRUE LOVE-"

"DON'T SEE. DON'T FEEL. DON'T LET IT FLOW-"

"THE CHOCOLATE WILL BE GONE TOMORROW, SO I MUST EAT IT ALL TODAAAAAAAAY!"

Elsa gave up.

"CAUSE THERE WILL BE A MILLION TYPE OF CHOCOLATE! A MILLION TYPES OF CHOCOLATE! HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIITTTTTTTTTTTTTT-" Then she ran into a horse and fell into an old fishing boat.

"OMIGOSH! Are you okay?" The man riding the horse asked as he slid off the saddle."

Anna groaned. "Yeah, I'm fine-"

"That stinky girl just ran right into you, didn't she?" The dude puckered his lips and talked in a baby voice while stroking his horse. He turned to Anna and said. "You should really watch where you're going."

Anna huffed. "Well excuse me, but it's hard to be in a singing battle and watch where you're going at the same time."

He stared at her and continued to stroke his horse. "Singing battle?" He questioned.

"Yes." Anna said brushing a fish off her shoulder. "The future queen of Arrendelle

doesn't give up so easily."

He gasped and paused mid-stroke. "The queeeeeeeeeeeen?" His eyes the size of a base-ball. "Does that mean you're her-"

"Siiiiiissssteeeer." She mocked, brushing a fish off her skirt.

His eyes turned to the size of bowling balls. He turned to consult with his horse as Anna brushed another fish off her skirt.

"Well Mr. Rainbow Sparkle Sugar Fancy Pants," He said in a low menacing tone. "It seems our window of opportunity has finally arrived. Now all we have to do is make this blundering idiotic fool of a princes fall in love with me, arrange an 'unfortunate accident' for the queen and then I will take Arrendale as my own!" Hethrew his head back and barked an evil laugh. "MWAHAHAHAHAHhahahahahahhahahaha…" It trailed off when he realized Anna was staring at him with a disturbed look on her face.

"What?" She said.

The stranger became fluster. "Well I didn't, uh... well, I sort of meant, uh... er, uhhhhhhhh…"

"You named your horse Sparkle Fancy Sugar Pants?"

The horse snorted.

He face-palmed. "Get it right. It's Mr. Rainbow Sparkle Sugar Fancy Pants."

It took a moment for Anna to remember correctly. "Uh, Rainbow… Sparkle….. Sugar….. Fancy Pants?"

He straitened his tie and held up his hand. "Uh-uh. _Mister_ Rainbow Sparkle Sugar Fancy Pants."

"Mr. Rainbow Sparkle Sugar Fancy Pants." Anna echoed. "What's your name?"

He stuck of a fancy pose. "Hans. Hans, of the Chocolate Isles." He said dramatically.

Anna leaned forward, almost making the boat tip forward. "Did you say... Choooooocolaaaaate Isleesss?!"

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**A/N: EVERYWHERE. I told you Anna was obsessed :P **


	5. Coronation Sandwiches

**A/N: New update! Sorry they aren't on a more persistent schedule, because we're literally making this up as we go along. XD**

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Anna stared at the strange man who had just proclaimed he was from the Chocolate Isles. He was begging to get weirded out. Before Anna could help it she was singing again.

"The coco beans are coming in!  
Let the feasting soon begin  
Who knew there-"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa! What are you doing?" Hans asked.

Anna stopped mid-song. "Oh sorry! The word chocolate just makes me want to burst in to song….."

There was an awkward silence.

…

…

…

…

…

"So, uh, shouldn't you go get a bath before the coronation starts?" Hans asked holding his nose.

Anna opened her mouth to protest saying she was going to take a chocolate bath but stopped. She didn't want to hang around the guy of her dreams smelling like skunk.

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Elsa's heart was pounding like someone had given the butterflies in her stomach a pair a jack hammers. The doors flung open and she saw the priest with his pointy hat thingy down the aisle waiting for her. She slowly walked forward as the choir uttered unintelligible phrases through the method of singing.

Elsa stood in front of the priest nervously rubbing her duck taped sponges together. Anna was no where to be seen. Typical, Elsa thought, rolling her eyes. She reached for the ball and bat resting on a fancy embodied pillow. The priest cleared his throat.

"Your majesty, the-" He stared her hands. "… Are those sponges?"

Elsa bit her lip. "Uh yeah, I can't really take them off."

"But you must, your majesty." The priest insisted. "Here let me help you." He said reaching out to grab a sponge.

Elsa's protest died on her tongue as the priest began to tug futilely. His face soon became red and flush with strain.

"Well then." He said straitening his pointing hat thingy.

"I was trying to tell you that its duck tapped. It's not going to come off that easily." Elsa said.

Reaching into his pocket, the priest pulled out a pocket knife. "We'll see about that."

After two knives, a sword, a mace, two spears, a chainsaw, and a light-saber the sponges had not moved an inch. The priest sat down panting giving the sponges a death glares that would have killed them if they were alive in the first place.

"Fine." He finally said. "I give up." He snatched the crown and put it on Elsa's head. Still slightly out of breath the priest composed himself best he could as Elsa turned to face the crowd. "I present to you, queen Elsa, of Arendelle."

"Elsa, of Arendelle!" The crowd began to clap.

An over exaggerated fan-boy jumped up on the pew holding a banner that read: "Elsa is #1" and started screaming, "OORAH OORAH OOOOOORAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" The security guards dragged him out. "I LOVE YOU, ELSA!" he continued to yell. "I'M YOUR BIGGEST FAN-" The doors slammed shut.

Elsa raised an eye brow. Who was that guy?

* * *

Anna raced down the hall, drying her hair on a towel as fast as humanly possible. She had to make it to the ball in time. She burst through the doors and headed straight for the nearest chocolate buffet and began to stuff her face.

A random guard stood up. "I present to you Queen Elsa of Arendelle." He announce as Elsa took her spot.

Anna shoved a chocolate truffle in her mouth.

People applauded.

Anna grabbed a chocolate covered strawberry….. Or five.

"And Princes Anna of Arendelle!"

The crowd applauded again, but there was no Anna. Elsa face-palmed… er, face-sponged.

Anna had rerouted the chocolate fountain to go directly in her mouth.

_Gulp, gulp, gulp, gulp._

"Anna…." Elsa said.

Anna continued to drink.

"Anna."

_Gulp, gulp, gulp, gulp, gulp, gulp, gulp, gulp, gulp_

"ANNA!"

She coughed and wiped her mouth. "WHAT-" She began to say when she realized every one was waiting on her. "Oh." Anna dashed into her spot as everyone finished their applauding for the third time. The two sisters stood there awkwardly for a few minutes.

"Hi." Elsa smiled.

"Hi? Hi me? Oh um Hi."

"You have chocolate on your face." Elsa commented.

There was a loud banging on the window that made every one jump. The fan boy had returned.

"EEEEEELSAAAAAAA!" He screamed. "YOUR'E MY HERO! I'M NUBMER ONE FAN!"

"Who in that guy?" Anna asked.

Elsa shrugged. He was really creeping her out.

A guard came up and said to queen Elsa. "I present to you the duke of Weselton!"

"That Weasel Town!" The old man corrected. He took a deep breath to compose himself, then continued."Weasel Town your majesty. As your closest partner in trade it seems only fitting that I offer you your first dance as queen." He struck what he thought was a majestic pose but made him look like a strangled peacock.

"I don't dance." Elsa grinned mischievously. This was perfect chance to get revenge on Anna for missing her coronation. "But my sister does."

The duke wasted no time. He grabbed Anna's hand and dragged her towards the dance floor. Anna glared at Elsa over her shoulder with a look that said she had better sleep with one eye open the rest of her life. Elsa just chuckled and waved.

* * *

Hans carefully inspected his sandwich then took a bite.

"Wow." He said taking a bigger bite. "Arendelle's sandwiches are the best." He got a idea and snapped his fingers. "I think I shall get some campaign to complement this wonderful sandwich." He put his sandwich on his plate. "Don't you worry little sandwich." He said in a baby voice. "I'll be back to finish your deliciousness in a minute."

He skipped off just as Anna and the Duke of Weasel Town dance by. The Duke began to break dance as Anna stood off awkwardl. While he spun on his bald head Anna eyed a lone sandwich sitting on a plate.

"Isn't that Hans' sandwich?" She thought to herself. "Oh I'm sure he won't mind." Anna had just enough lime to pop the sandwich in her mouth as the duke grabbed her hand and twirled her around. But she ended up tripping on her feet. She began to fall head first! Her arms flailed around widely and she was just about to scream when Hans caught her.

"Glad I caught you." Hans smiled. He set his campaign on a tray that was conveniently located and they began to dance.

"I'm really glad you caught me cause that would have hurt. That Duke of Weasel Town was really driving me bonkers! Can't wait to blah blah blah blah blah." Anna continued to ramble on and on and on and on and on and on and on but Hans wasn't' paying attention. He had just caught sight of the now empty plate that once held his sandwich. Someone at this coronation had stolen his sandwich. Someone was going to pay.

He would make sure of that.

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**A/N: DUN DUN DUUUUUN... No one messes with Hans' sandwich and gets away with it. **

**Have an idea, compliment, or opinion on our parody? Then let us know in the reviews! They are the gas to out engines... or something like that.**


	6. Love is a Sugar Rush

**A/N: We're back! Sorry for the long delay, but it took us forever and a day to write the parody for Love is and Open Door... Hope y'all enjoy the update!**

**Oh, and for those who asked, the random fanboy in the previous chapter is basically an embodiment of all Elsa's fanboys.**

**Underlined words are being sung.**

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Hans rubbed his ears to make sure they weren't bleeding. The poor socially deprives princes had been yammering non-stop. Hans went along nodding and smiling absentmindedly, it was in this way he got himself in big trouble.

"No way!" Anna gasped. "For real?" She grabbed a cupcake (chocolate of course) and shoved it in his hands. "Prove it!" She dared.

Hans looked at the cupcake and back at Anna, confused. "What?" He raised an eyebrow.

Anna huffed. "I asked if you thought that you could eat a cupcake in one bite and you nodded your head and smiled. Although you did seem a little absent minded….." Anna began to ramble again. "Oh well I guess only real manly men can eat cupcakes in one bite."

Hans interrupted when he felt his ego being threatened. "Whoa, whoa, whoa, wait a minute. Of course I can eat it in one bite."

Anna pointed to the cupcake. "Prove it then."

Hans stared at the chocolate frosting and gulped. "_You can do this man."_ Hans thought to himself. "_Just pretend it's your delicious sandwich."_ He brought the cupcake to his open mouth… paused a brief moment…. Then shoved it in his mouth.

"Yeah! Yeah!" Anna cheered and clapped. "The whole thing!"

Hans tried to swallow the cupcake, but in his nerviness he forgot to remove the little paper cup. It got stuck half way down his throat.

Anna gave him a curious look as face turned purple. "Um, Hans? Are you ok?"

He made a noise that sounded like someone was trying to shave Chewbacca.

"OH MY GOSH! You're choking!" Anna ran up to him and beat him on the back while his face turned several unnatural shades. At last Hans coughed up the paper cup.

They both sat silently on the balcony. In attempted to break the awkward silence Anna said, "So…. You have how many brothers?"

"Twelve." Hans answered his voice a little husky. "Three of them pretended I was invisible, literally, for three years."

"That's awful." Anna said.

"Besides random singing battles, that's what brothers do."

"And sisters." Anna continued. "Me and Elsa-"

"Elsa and I." Hans corrected.

Anna stared at him blankly.

He sighed. "Never mind continue."

"Anyways, we used to be really close, but one day she shut me out. Now I'm lucky to get a singing battle with her."

Hans grabbed her hands. "I would always to singing battles with you, and I would never shut you out."

Anna gasped. "For real?"

"For real."

Anna smiled. "Can I say something cray-cray?"

"I love cray-cray."

And that is the moment Hans and Anna began their first singing battle.

"All my life I've been shoving chocolate in my face  
And then suddenly I bump into you."

She sang as she skipped towards the door and slammed it shut for no reason.

"I was thinking the same thing cause like,  
All I want in life is to stuff my face  
with chocolate sweets and candy and chocolate fondue  
Hans sang

Anna giggled. "But with you…."

"But with you! I found my place." They sang together.

"I see you face.  
You're way much more than just a silly crush  
Cause love is a sugar rush!  
Love is a sugar rush!  
Love is a sugar rush  
With you! With you!  
Love is a sugar rush."

They sang at the top of their lungs running through various parts of the castle and ended up on the roof staring at the stars.

"I mean it's cray cray!" Hans sang.

"What?"

"We finish each other's-"

"Sandwiches!"

Anna jumped off the roof, but Hans froze in his tracks. The world seemed to grow dark around him as realization slammed into him like a ton of bricks. He should have known. How could he have been so blind? For she, the seemingly innocent red headed girl, was the culprit responsible for mercilessly gobbling down his delicious sandwich. Hans' fist clenched at his side and suddenly felt slightly less guilty about his plot to take over Arendelle. Anna would pay for eating his sandwich.

Hans forced a smile and sang, "That's what I was going to say!" He stomped off after Anna who didn't notice the sinister change in his countenance.

"I've never met someone who likes chocolate as much as me!"

Anna sang from the top of a clock she'd somehow managed to climb. Hans scrambled after her, replying:  
I know! I know right!

Our crave for something delicious  
means our love is not fictitious  
You and I were just meant to feast."

Hans and Anna waltzed together up a cliff.

Anna took a unexpected solo.

"You and me-"

"You and I." Hans corrected. Anna earthier ignored him or didn't hear him.

"Both love chocolate  
That makes us so much more than a silly crush.  
Cause love is a sugar rush!  
Love is a sugar rush!  
We're so much more than a crush  
With you-  
With you-  
With you!  
Love is a sugar rush…"

Hans and Anna finally made it up to the top panting and out of breath after the epic singing battle.

"Can I say something cray cray?"  
Hans grabbed her hand and knelt down on one knee. Staring into her eyes he tried to forget the fact that he viciously murdered his sandwich as he proposed. "Will you marry me?"

Anna mouth fell open. "Can I say something ever cray crayer?" She gasped back. "Yes!"


	7. Secrets Revealed

**A/N: WE'RE BAAAAACK! (Sorry it took so long. We're lazy :P )**

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Anna strutted through the castle dragging Hans behind her. "Step aside, Peasants!" She yelled dramatically while stepping on everybody's toes.

Hans apologized to the people.

"Oh there she is!" Anna said. "Elsa… I mean queen… Me again."

"Anna, it's not my fault if the chiefs ran out of chocolate- who's this?"

"He's my Bae." Anna said dreamy eyed.

Elsa raised an eyebrow. "What does that mean?"

Anna crinkled her nose deep in thought. "I think it means Bacon And Eggs."

"No actually," Hans interrupted. "It means Best Anyone Else."

The two sisters stared at him. "No, I'm pretty sure it's bacon and eggs." Elsa said.

"Anyway." Anna continued. "We would like your blessing for our marriage." The struck the most adorable pose ever and gave her the biggest puppy dog eyes.

Elsa stared at them. Then burst out in laughter. She held her gut and rolled on the ground as tears of mirth filled her eyes. Everyone at the ball stopped and stared at the queen who was trying to stand and still quite breathless. Elsa stopped suddenly as realization dawned on her. "Oh wait…. You're serious?"

"Yeah." Anna said.

"Okaay, this is awkward." Elsa did her best to compose what was let of her dignity. She stood up straight, head held high, poised and graceful like the royalty she was. "Anna…. You can't marry a ginger. They don't have souls."

Hans and Anna stared at her. "Elsa." Anna blinked. "I'm ginger."

"Oh." Elsa said quite flustered. "What I meant to say was: You can't marry a man you just met."

Anna gave Hans' arm a death grip. "But you can if it's true love." She said dramatically like she was in some soap opera.

"Anna, you said your true love is chocolate." Elsa pointed out.

"Not anymore!" She pulled Hans closer to her. "Hans is my man!"

Hans smiled to himself. He certainly was da man.

Elsa bit her lip and looked between the two red headed lovers. "Anna, can I speak to you? Alone?"

"What are you so afraid of that you won't come right out and say it?" Anna exclaimed throwing her hands around. Hans barely avoided being slapped for the umpteenth time.

"FINE!" Elsa yelled. "Get married, eat chocolate, become obese, SEE IF I CARE!"

"Why do you always shut me out?! Blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah!"

Hans smirked slyly and watched the sisters argue. "Just a few more days." He thought. "And I'll kill the queen and become king. I'm so clever I could just marry myself-"

To keep Elsa from leaving, Anna grabbed the sponge. Apparently all the work the priest had done made a dent because it ripped right off. Anna stared at the sponge in her hand while Elsa screamed in the agony of having duct tape viciously ripped off her hand. Unfortunately, it made her lose control of her powers for the first time in forever. All the guests got soaked. The Duke of Weasel Town got especially drenched.

"SCOCERY! *cough cough cough cough*." He sputtered.

Anna stared at her sister in shock. No wonder she had been such a hermit all her life.

Terrified, Elsa ran out of the ballroom, shoving all the peasants aside. She stopped and the edge of the fjord.

"ELSA!" Anna yelled running after her.

With the wave of her hand, Elsa made a wave of water and surfed across the it. Unknown to the water logged queen, the water kept rising till all of Arendelle was nearly submerged.

Hans and Anna floated on the water and watched Elsa make her retreat. Anna watched on with shock and dismay while Hans stared on wide eyed and slacked jaw. He was going to have to come up with a new plan.

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**A/N: It's short, but better than nothing... I hope...**

**Please review! **


	8. Let it Splash

**A/N: *bursts through a thousand doors* DID YOU MISS US? We kinda forgot about this fic until ElvenRangerRysel requested more. So kudos to you, we hope this meets your expectations.**

**Now comes our long awaited (SARCASM) version of Let it Go. Enjoy this or else... *does the i'm watching you gesture***

**Just kidding.**

**Or am I?**

**I honestly don't know.**

**Underlined words are being sung. **

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The distraught queen of Arrendelle sought refuge in the mountain. The unthinkable had happened. They knew! They all knew of her accursed powers. So Elsa, just like any other desperate, broken individual would do, began to sing.

"The moon reflects white on the puddles tonight,  
Only mud to be seen  
A kingdom of rehydration."

Elsa threw her hands up sarcastically and yelled:  
"Yipee, I'm the queen!"

She continued her melancholy stroll.

"The waters rising like all these feels inside.  
The dams about to burst, I'm about to cry  
Don't let them see, don't get them wet  
I don't like that guy Anna met  
Conceal don't feel, don't get them know."

Elsa reached down to take off her other duct-taped sponge.  
"Well now they- *Rip* AAAAAAAAAOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWW!"

When Elsa finally recovered from the pain, she restarted her song.

"Let it splash! Let it splash  
I'm done with all this balderdash."  
She conjured up a puddle and jumped in it.  
"LET it splash Let it splash  
Let the large waves crash.

I don't care  
if they all complain  
Let the storm begin  
I was never bothered by the rain."

The Queens's confidence began to rise as she began experimenting with her powers.

"It's funny how a down pour  
Washes everything away  
And if they don't like it  
I'll blast them to next Friday."

To prove her point she blasted a tree and ended up cutting it in half. She cringed. "Oops."

"It's time to see what water can do  
to test its limits and break through."

Elsa formed a water slide with a flick of her wrist.

"This ain't you're danty moring dew  
I'm warning you."

Enthusiastically, the young Queen took no notice of her fancy clothes and hoped right on the slide, singing at the top of her lungs all the way down.

"Let it splash. Let it splash  
I am one with the river and sea  
Let it splash let it splash  
All the water will obey me

Here I dive  
And here I'll swim  
Let the storm begin"

With a wave of her hand, Elsa began to construct the biggest pool know to mankind.

"My power swirls into a massive whirl pool  
All the lakes, and ponds, and the oceans I now rule  
With one thought I can blast you with H2O  
I'll never worry or fret  
I'll just go with the flow!"

Apparently Elsa had dress making powers too because her coronation dress turned into a striking dark blue gown. Which technically isn't the most practical thing to swim in but Elsa does what she wants.

"Let it splash let it splash  
And I'll rise like a tidal wave  
Let it splash let is splash  
I will no long quave."

She gracefully scaled the ladder to her diving board as she wrapped up her epic ballad.

"Here I dive  
I have everything to gain  
Let the storm begin  
I was never bothered by the rain."

Elsa dove into her newly constructed swimming pool. For the first time in forever, she was happy with her powers. Pun intended. Again.

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**Hopefully the next update won't take sooooooo looooonnnggg but no promises. Until next time! Reviews and ideas are always appreciated :D  
**


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